Open Question: homophobic/fetish issues, HELP?

[feedcrawler]

I'm a guy. I have really bad OCD which has even resulted in a few tics, including a noise I make with my nose, yawning, etc. I've also learned over time that I suffer from HOCD and intrusive thoughts. One thing that I really DON'T LIKE about me is that feet turn me on. girl's feet. I'll look through girl's pictures until I find one that has a little bit of feet in it. It's been getting closer to being my biggest turn on and I feel extremely guilty. I'm fucking strange for liking feet. Why the fuck would anyone want to jack off to something that smells and serves no sexual purpose to the majority of society?That said, my intrusive thoughts usually have me constantly thinking about sexual scenarios involving ANYONE -- male, female, even my family. They are provoked by simply looking at a person. If I accidentally look at my grandmother's feet for example... I could imagine her and I in a sexual situation involving feet and I feel absolutely terrible. IT'S NOT ME AND IT'S NOT WHAT I WANT. I'm terrified of looking at guys' feet and getting a boner and it's almost happened. Many times. I know for a fact that I AM NOT FUCKING GAY.I'm already disturbed enough by the fact that I have a foot fetish, but I'm terrified of eventually giving into the thoughts and liking guy's feet, men in general, family members, even little kids... Feet usually trigger it all and I need to find a way to eliminate the feet factor from my mind. I'm dealing with a lot of problems regarding anxiety, depression and insecurities and the bit about OCD and these terrible thoughts and actions I've taken aren't helping at all.

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