Open Question: why does this keep happening to me with my friends?

[feedcrawler]

I love yahoo answers cuz i can speak my mind with no1 knowing who it is, and no one can ever find out...no matter how weird or awkward the things i say are (nothing about this account is real btw )anyway...this is really weird so bare with me...btw i'm a incoming junior in high schoolso since fifth grade, i have become really attached to my friends in really strange ways. In fifth and sixth grade, i had this friend that i loved to hang out with. he was average fifth grader height, but weighed 160 lbs. after a while, i started wanting to be fat, and it actually turned into a fetish....like...to this day, i like some fat men's bellies. (weird enough yet?)in 7th and 8th grade, i developed a foot fetish, which i still have. one person, who's feet were my favorite of all the people at my school (yes, i made up a way to look at people's feet at school) had a gap beween his big toe and second toe, and since then, i've wanted a gap like that. similarly in 9th grade and this past year, i've foudn other things attractive now...so that now i think that the perfect foot has...a gap between those toes, is a little wide with not much hair, low cut flesh colored toenails and with a soft bottom. and i strive to make my feet look like that...its crazy!recently, i transfered schools, and found another kid who's feet i like. however its' really hard to get to see his feet at thisi school, and requires him coming over. so i began liking his fingernails, which he bites down really far. if yo look at like the past 10 of my questions, they're all about biting nails, because of him. i have now began biting my nails way down, so that they look liek his (pictures in my previous questions). now his nails, and ONLY his nails, turn me on so much. it's getting weirder and weirder, and like distracting me all the time.so i've decided i'm gay. i must beso is all this me just like falling in love? is that how love feels? you take something distinctive about someone, and suddenly it becomes really hot and turns you on? also, with the guy i mentioned in 7th and 8th grade, i was OBSESSIVE over him. always wanted to talk to him all the time. couldn't stand to be without him. we had like 4 hour txt conversations every night. now, in 10th grade wih his kid i just met in september, we've been doin the same thing, and i've been just as, if not more obsessive. it's really strange, and i really want out. i mean. of course i still love talking to him, his feet, nails, etc. but i know how much of a freak i am, and it's really annoying me. one side of me likes the pleasure, the other side hates the weirdness.if you've made it this far, you may be able to provide some input...any help (not hate) is appreciatedP.S. when i was 2, i was separated from my 13 year old birth mom, and now live in California. my adoption mom (who is my birth aunt) says that when i was little, i saw a psychologist about attachment issues...maybe this has soemthing to do with it? idk...i just know i need helpTHANKS

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