I want to be straight and some day settle down with wife +kids but ive been having feelings for some one who shares room with me, a male room mate from college that i dont want to have feelings for, but cant help having, which gets me down. i lost my virginity to a female friends a couple of months ago and ive always been able to get aroused by females but lately i have been finding it difficult and its making me unhappy and anxious. it was not like this before but when i watch porn flicks now, i can hardly get a semi never mind reaching orgasm but then i can get hard without even realising it when my room mate is around me. this is probably irrelevant but ive always been into feet, well, for as long as i can remember really but i began first getting really turned on when i saw my room mates feet when we were in the living room we were together and he had them up on the footrest ever since then its just been an obsessive thing i cant help looking at them but i fantasise about other things as well not just his feet. i used to have thoughts like these when i was in the grade before leaving high school but just thought i could be bisexual which didnt bother me but i rarely have thoughts for women now and looking at porno mags doesnt do it for me as being in the same room as my friend does. i feel better having gotten this down in writing but i cant live with this its gone out of control and gone beyond just being a fetish and its controlling my life what the hell is going wrong with me im 19 i hope this is just a phase?
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